If you’ve ever justified your actions by saying, “This is college; this is what I’m supposed to do,” then this article is for you. College is a great time for experimentation, figuring out who you are and utilizing your newfound freedom apart from the constraints of high school and parent-enforced curfews.
There’s this idea that college is the time to do certain things, but furthermore, that it’s also the only acceptable time to do certain things.
In reality, college is just one little portion of your entire life that you can spend however you choose. You don’t have to feel like society is peer-pressuring you during college; you can make your own agenda. Here are six things you shouldn’t feel pressured to do in college:
Have a “slutty phase.”
Not having sex doesn’t make you frigid, and having sex doesn’t make you a slut. You’re not behind on the times if you want to wait a little to have sex with someone, and you’re not less respectable if you choose to have sex with someone you met three hours ago.
However, if you do choose to engage in casual sex, good replacements for using the term “slutty phase” include “having fun,” “living the way you want to live” or just “having sex.”
Stop calling it a slutty phase and own your sexuality, but don’t feel like you have to have sex with a ton of people during college because “this is the only acceptable time to do that.”
If there’s one thing “Sex and the City” truly taught us, it’s that there isn’t a shelf life on your sexual expression.
Drink excessively.
There’s this idea that college students will be college students, which apparently entails drinking excessively and causing a ruckus wherever they go.
If you don’t want to be part of this demographic, go out when you want to and stay in when you want to. I promise you’ll find friends that enjoy similar activities.
If you do want to get hammered every weekend, then go right ahead, but also recognize that as long as you’re being healthy with your drinking habits into your adulthood, you have a lot more time to (legally) have a good time with the help of that vodka tonic. College certainly isn’t the only time to do that.
Do drugs.
A lot of people experiment with drugs in college, but a lot of people also experiment with drugs in high school and far beyond their college years.
If you find yourself in a situation where you’re only doing drugs because someone pressured you into it, and you’re excusing it by saying that this is the only time you have to engage in such activity, stop. Actually consider if you would be acting the same if you weren’t in college.
Experimenting is fine, but doing so just because you feel like this is the only time you have to be reckless, or just to try them at all, is a result of a misinformed assumption that college years are the only time you have to do so.
Overwork yourself.
If you find yourself constantly stressing out about your GPA, aiming to have an internship every semester or packing your schedule with every résumé-boosting activity you can think of, pump the breaks.
You have plenty of time to build your résumé. Sure, college is a great time to do some awesome things (like internships and leadership activities and whatever else), but you can also take a year off to travel or to do community service and that will look just as good on your résumé post-college.
You have time.
Find a marriage partner.
While I hope most people don’t go to college for the purpose of finding a husband or a wife, there’s still an underlying idea that this is a good time to find someone because you’re absolutely surrounded by people. There might even be someone you have your eye on as future relationship material.
Don’t go to college thinking that you’re going to find the man or woman you’ll spend the rest of your life with. You have so much time to find that person. If you find someone during your college years, congratulations.
If you don’t, you have so much time that I hope this isn’t even a concern.
Have the best four years of your life.
Life does not end after college. Just like high school wasn’t supposed to be the best four years of your life (LOL), college isn’t going to be the best, either.
College is great, but if you look at your college career as what is going to be the best four years of your entire life, you’re either going to be very disappointed during college, or you’re never going to look forward to the life that you’re going to live after graduation.
If you peak during college, that means you have to plateau at some point.